I fell and got pregnant…do I need to marry him?!
You don’t know how it happened…
He was just a friend who came by for a visit.
You had known each other back in high school, and haven’t seen each other in a long time.
You live alone but you kept the door open while he was there. How he ended up in bed with you, you’ll probably never understand.
Are you sorry about it? Of course! You have repented with tears! And, by God’s grace, you have finally forgiven yourself. Now you just want to move on…(and you made a vow to host all other male visits virtually…Zoom or WhatsApp will do from now on!)
There’s just one teeny, tiny problem.
Just when you thought you had closed that chapter, you find out that you are expecting…
…a child!😬
Yes! You are pregnant.
Out of wedlock.
As a Christian young woman.
Better hurry up and do a quick wedding ceremony before everyone finds out!
At least, that’s what some people might say…
Here are the reasons they might give to you for marrying your child's dad:
1. Everybody knows you’re a Christian, so marry and save yourself the disgrace of exposed fornication.
2. You don’t want your child to grow up without a steady father. And you probably know from the experience of others, how exhausting custody issues can be!
3. If you eventually marry someone else, all your children will not have the same last name. Everyone will know he’s different, and questions will probably arise from both outsiders and even his siblings😯
Now doesn’t that list sound convincing? Those arguments seem to carry a lot of weight.
But what if I tell you NOT to marry that young man?
Here are my four reasons why you shouldn’t just jump and get married to your baby’s father:
1. Your happenchance sexual encounter was NOT God’s matchmaking.
2. He's probably not saved. (Trust me, even if he said he was a Christian, if he came on to you, there is a strong possibility he’s not saved!) And you shouldn’t go marrying an unbeliever😑
3. You don’t need to try to avoid disgrace. You have already confessed and repented before the One to whom your sin really matters.
4. God’s grace will cover you and the child for the challenges of identity, custody or other issues that might arise.
Are you convinced?
I hope my thoughts on this matter have reached to your heart 🤗
I know being a single parent can be hard. And yes the child might be raised in two separate homes.
But adding marriage to the mix will make things worse…permanently! At least now, you still have the option of living a separate, sanctified life while waiting on God to choose a husband for you.
My advice for you
If you have fallen into sexual sin and become pregnant (and even if you haven't gotten pregnant 🤷🏽♀️) this is what I recommend:
1. Close all doors:
I'm talking about those old high school and college loves and likes; novels and films; lust and perhaps masturbation; anything that might have made you more open to falling into this kind of sexual sin needs to be identified and renounced.
2. Seek deliverance
The unfortunate reality of sin is that it often opens doors to unclean spirits☹️. Since you fell into sexual sin, it would be wise to seek deliverance from any spirit that may have entered through the doorway of fornication. Don't wait on some new struggle to begin manifesting in your life. Cast out unclean spirits just in case they're there! You could do self-deliverance, but if you're not so knowledgeable or comfortable with that, find a good, clean, solid, Holy Spirit set of believers to pray with you for deliverance.
3. Deepen your roots
It's always a good move to draw closer to God through prayer, Bible-reading, and the right fellowship. It might also be a valuable choice to find a good Bible-based blog to subscribe to – one that will nourish and strengthen your soul…(hmm…now where will I find a blog like that?😉)
Thanks for stopping by today!
God bless you my fellow Christian damsel 🤗
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